Wednesday, February 27, 2008

number 2

So I have a freakishly sensitive sense of smell. No lie, I can tell if my friends have changed up their shampoo to a different brand. I would have made one hell of a nose (the perfume industry kind) I tell ya. And when I had my sinus surgery last summer, my surgeon was telling me how great this was going to be because I would be able to breathe easier and my sense of smell would also improve. What?

How to even say the next part? Let's just say that I find bathrooms a bit on the unpleasant side. Particularly one that has just recently provided a service of the... post-digestive kind. I've placed a candle on the top of the toilet tank with a book of matches or sometimes a lighter to encourage guests to light up when the need arises. I also have a bottle of eau de toilette (whose scent I don't care for on me) which I placed on the shelf above the toilet intending for it to be used as a room spray. But both tactics seem to miss the mark.

I decided yesterday that maybe if the bottle was placed on the toilet with higher visibility, it would encourage more frequent use. Oh, but it's a glass bottle and I'd hate for it to tip over and fall or maybe someone set it down too hard on the ceramic toilet top and there be broken glass.

Problem solved.

That's right. You're lookin' at a hand-crocheted room spray cozy for the bathroom. All the stylish loo's in design mags have them. Haven't you heard?

I decided to name this "Number 2" figuring that a pointed euphemism was preferred over a more direct nomenclature. Preferred by me at least.

With further suggestions on the back. Just in case you missed the point.


meteowrite said...

You must mail this to N-teo. You know it'll make his day. Or his week.

jean said...

I did think of him as I wrote it. and H. And surprisingly (or not?) colon blow. Ah, good times, good times.

james said...

geez another reference to bowel movements. i thought talking about bowel movements and the such were limited to family meals around the dinner table.